Life is no remedy game

Showered with sunshine in a mini-van accompanied with my best songs, im on the way to the dock to get across to another island.
What im thinking is many.
I always dwell on so many things looking at the scenery in fast pace.
Life's quite peaceful here, sort of life im looking for despite the amount of mosques that somehow is, no offense, irritating at the dawn.
I have been pondering about what i have journeyed the past months, all the good and the bad moments, all the laughter and tear, from when i was friend with him til he takes big part in my life.
Oh, what am i doing ?
A month to go before my departure, i thought time would give me remedy, oh yeah, what have i been thinking ? Life's no remedy game.
i have the fear of being disappointed, i have pretty damn abysmal trauma in love. And also, pretty damn much guilt in breaking people' hearts, am i going to do this to him ?
I don't know, i tend to talk less about what's coming next, i simply tell myself "Do your best in the present".
Because after i have journeyed, talking much about the future would never change what is actually destined.
I don't want to be disappointed, either does he. We are not playing, i never played hearts after i take the decision of being in relationship, and im pretty glad, he is being so appreciative about what i feel, about my past trauma, and my thought. He assures me for many times that he is serious. Uhm, yeah.. I bet he will keep his words.
Besides what's not in me ? I might not have the prettiest face, the biggest eyes, or the most stylish girl, but i have the courage to struggle what i desire for, i have the guts to stick to my principal, i have the dreams which most of my friends would think im out of my mind. I might not dream to be an astronaut, a president or a doctor, yet im sure whatever is coming to me, i can cope with it. Because im strong, maybe i cry sometimes, but who cares ? Crying never means you are weak.
Thinking about some people that talk about me at the back just because i am in relationship with a single man, it's weird uh ?
Jealousy or whatever, i don't give a damn.
I had the same thing in the past, and funny how not everyone laughs when you do. That's what i learn.
You never need to look good in everyone's eyes, yet simply be one to those who love us sincerely.

Happy Sunday ;)